As a parent, it’s my responsibility to punish my kids. If I don’t do it now, somebody else will when they are older.
We punish small things with small punishments before someone else has to punish big things with big punishments. Tweet That
But, how you punish your children needs to be one of the topics you and your spouse spend significant time talking about. I know couples who have talked longer about the decision to get a pet then they have talked about how they will parent and punish their kids.
Don’t get caught up looking for the right and perfect way to punish your kids. There is no such thing. As long as you are doing it out of love and not doing harm, you are okay. If you prefer to spank over giving timeouts. Good for you. If you prefer to never spank your kids…that’s good too.
What About Creative “Punishment”
I hope you give some serious thought to creative punishment.
I love creative punishment. My favorite book on the subject is Parenting With Love and Logic. It’s full of creative ideas to parent your child’s bad decisions.
Just make sure you consider your ideas carefully.
Here are some things I suggest. Now, I’m using strong wording like….”Don’t do this”….if you disagree with me. GREAT. Your allowed…maybe you should. But don’t go away mad, instead comment below. Let’s talk. Together, we’ll learn and grow and become better parents.
These are suggestions.
TIPS AND SUGGESTIONS:
- Don’t make kids apologize as a punishment. You want them to learn to say they are sorry because it’s the right thing to do. Give a punishment, then parent them into making an apology.
- Don’t make your kids give money to anything as a punishment. You want them to give out of charity, not because they are forced to. When they are older, they will be less likely to give on their own.
- Don’t threaten a punishment if you aren’t going to actually follow through. You want your kids to trust you in everything you say. If you say, “Stop or I’m taking that toy back to the store.” If they don’t stop and you don’t take that toy back to the store. You lied. You just showed them that telling a lie is okay. If you repeat these empty threats to your kids, when they get older if you say, “Don’t do that or someone might get really hurt.” Why would they believe you?
- Just like every kid has a different Love Language, they have a different discipline language. What works for one kid, may not work for the other.
- Don’t use the Bible, going to church or homework as a punishment either. This make all of these things negative.
- Never hold back love from your kid. The moment I spank my daughter, if…and only if….she asks me to hold her, I do. I want her to know I love her, I didn’t love her behavior. If she doesn’t ask, I don’t offer. That would be selfish on my part.
ACTION YOU CAN TAKE RIGHT NOW:
- Talk with your spouse and make sure you are on the same plan when it comes to punishing your kids.
- Check out the book, Parenting With Love and Logic
RELATED POST FROM MY BLOG:
- The Character Growth Chart
- How To Parent The Right Way
- How To Help Develop Solid Character In Your Kids
RELATED POST FROM MY WIFE’S BLOG:
- Raising Your Kids To Be The Adults You Want Them To Be; Part One
- Raising Your Kids To Be The Adults You Want Them To Be; Part Two
Question: What’s one of the parenting lessons you’ve learned that you think is important for all parents to know? What’s your favorite creative punishment?
If you are another blogger and have a post related to this that others might find helpful, please feel free to share a link in the comments.