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Have you ever been frustrated that you spend to much quality time with your kids? I’m guessing the answer is no.

Distracted Parent With Family

Image courtesy of Ambro at

Have you ever promised yourself, “I’m going to spend more quality time with my kids/family.” I’m guessing the answer is yes.

Have you ever promised that you were done checking your phone during family time? That you were done agreeing to commitments that take you away from your family? I’m guessing probably so.

Here’s my last question. Have you ever promised these things more than once?

I like to maximize time. So, a good practice is to ask how one piece of advice or wisdom applies to other areas of life. If you learn a nifty leadership lesson or axiom, spend some time thinking how that applies to your parenting or marriage. And, take marriage and parenting advice to work when it applies.

So, when I heard Andy Stanley say, “All organization drift towards complexity over time.” I first realized the truth in this in the organization I lead.  I started making changes to simplify our structure, processes and procedures.

Then, one day I was thinking about this leadership truth for business and realized the same is true for parenting.

All parents drift towards complexity over time.


Fight The Parenting Drift


  • Have an iDrawer. Find someplace to stash the smartphone and tablet when it’s family time.
  • Schedule family time. Seriously, add time onto your calendar labeled Family Time. I know, it sounds bad to schedule your family. But let me ask this….how is not scheduling them been working?
  • Limit the extra circular activities your kids participate in.
  • Use an iSabbath iFamily folder on your smartphone.
  • Learn to tell your boss no. If you can’t take on an additional project because it will require more time away from your family, respectfully say no. If your boss get’s mad…that’s their problem. If you get fired, call me, I’ll hire you. A real leader wants people on their team with character. Putting your family first shows character. (okay, so it’s irresponsible to get fired. Instead find another job right away and leave where you are now. It’s more irresponsible to stay. And, I can’t really hire you anyhow, that was a just to make a point.)
  • Learn to tell others no. I was recently honored with a pretty huge request from our church. I really really really wanted to say yes. But, I couldn’t fit it into my calendar without taking away time from family. So, I had to say no. And guess what? They found someone else. And my kids don’t think I’m a stranger. I simply said, “I am so honored to have been asked. And I hope you’ll consider asking me again in the future. But, at this time, I have to say no. I can’t give it the time it requires to be done correctly.”
  • Become a morning person. I get up at 5am now and crank out a ton of work before the kids get up anywhere between 7:30 and 8. Now I have free time in the evening to play.


  • Schedule time on your calendar for you and your spouse to create an ideal daily calendar complete with meals, play time, work time, prayer time, etc.
  • Look at your current commitments, what can you get out of. (Listen to Michael Hyatt’s Podcast; So Your Over Committed, Now What?)




  • I’d love to hear your reply in the comments to: What do you do to keep family time protected?  Is this an issue for you?  What could help you be better at protecting this time?

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